Archive for October 28th, 2004

Professors and Other Rubes

Every con man who has ever lived has fooled the rubes, the suckers, the hicks, with the following phrase:

“Things are not as they appear.”

Did God give us eyes or did Evolution give us eyes? God or evolution, the reason we have eyes is because things ARE as they appear.

What a con man does to a hick, a rube, a moron is to get something from him for nothing.

So he says, “What you get from me APPEARS to be nothing. But things are not as they appear.”

Somewhere in me there is a Bob Whitaker who screams in rage when I take organized religion seriously. That Bob says:

“Preacher, if you mean what you say you will be like St. Paul and make tents for a living. Preacher, if you are serious you will be like St. Peter and work for a living.”

Somewhere in me is a Bob Whitaker who says, “No, Family Values or Equality or We Owe it to So-and-So means nothing.”

When you preach at me, the Diplomatic Bob Whitaker pretends to take you seriously.

But inside me there is a voice saying, “I am not a moron. I am not a hick or a rube or a professor or a New York City provincial. I am Bob Whitaker, and what you are saying doesn’t mean a damned thing.”

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Identical Twins

Just a few years ago there was a huge fad on television. People would find identical twins who had been separated at birth and adopted separately, and reunite them.

These identical twins were raised in totally different families with totally different Family Values. Some were raised by poor, uneducated families. Their twins were raised by well-to-do, highly educated families.

Some were raised by Catholics. Some were raised by Jews. Some were raised by atheists and others by Protestants.

It was GREAT television. Most of the identical twins didn’t even know they had a twin.

Identical twins have EXACTLY the same genes. They even have the same fingerprints. When the twins met for the first time they discovered there were incredible similarities between them, no matter how different the families were in which they were raised.

Identical twins separated at birth commit the same crimes at the same age. They prefer the same toothpaste, they marry similar women at a similar age.

And on and on and on.

Same jobs. Same intelligence. Same, same, same. On the television shows the identical twins who had recently discovered each other would talk about how the other twin “is me.” It was fascinating.

I saw this this fad of identical twins end with a sudden crash.

A man had gotten together identical TRIPLETS, none of whom was aware of the other. It was such a big deal it was on Phil Donahue.

The whole thing was going great until Phil Donahue dropped a bomb on the guy he was interviewing, the man who had gotten the triplets together. Donahue said, “Doesn’t this favor those who believe that heredity is more important than environment?”

The guy he was interviewing, the guy who had found the identical triplets, looked like he had been slapped in the face.

He knew very well that “heredity” means “Hitler.” Donahue had just accused him of being anaziwhowantstokillsixmillionjews.

“No, no, no,” he said. The fact that identical twins raised in completely different families and totally different families were just alike didn’t mean heredity was important.

On that day the identical twin fad ended totally. Before that show there had been at least two dozen national shows about identical twins being reunited. After Donahue reminded the media what that identical twin stuff meant, there was not one more “identical twins reunite” show. The ones already scheduled were suddenly cancelled.

In my book I talk about the greatest identical twins study ever made. A thousand identical twins raised in totally different environments from the time they were less than two weeks old were compared.

In Russia, the environments that children are raised in are VERY different. But the twins were astoundingly alike in every way: crime, talents, intelligence tests.

Same, same, same.

This study was conducted by the Medicogenetical Institute of Moscow.

Heredity is HERESY to the political left.

The Medicogenetical identical twins came out in 1934, when Stalin ruled Russia. Stalin wiped them out. The Institute ceased to exist. The head of the Medicogenetical Institute “confessed his ideological error” and was shot.

All identical twin studies come out that way. So no one talks about them.

“Your life,” they say, “is shaped by your family values and how you were raised.”

That is Gospel on the political left. That is Gospel on the political right.

It’s not true.

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