Peter hit a point that needs emphasizing.

I keep saying that my approach WORKS. Peter explained what that MEANS. Read what he says CAREFULLY:

“Yes, Bob I too agree that your quips work. ”

“The trick is to learn the signs of success. For example when we have hit home, the other may switch topics. But if the other replies with something unkind and below the belt, he has lost, is aware that he has lost and will not be worth pursuing, although anyone else listening may benefit from what they hear. Gentle parrying from someone one considers honest can be a sign that he is interested at least intellectually. Keep it low key and conversation normal, and if the person brings up the topic again, we have the right to reply. ”

RIGHT!

In a discussion, most people naturally want to come out on TOP. They want to LOOK good.

I am trying to save my race.

So when I say my tactics — and they involve a hell of lot more than “quips” — WORK, I do NOT mean they make the other guy concede your point. What they do is put the other person in an impossible position. So Peter has put in a critical piece of coaching that I left out.

We want the other guy to go away gunshy. We want him to realize for the first time in his life that what his Mommy Professors told him can’t stand up among adults.

Above all, our talk is aimed at the OTHER people there. We want them thinking, “Lord, I don’t want to be in the position of that poor bastard. If I had come up with all the so-called wisdom on race my professors filled me with, I would be squirming in my chair the way he is.”

Peter, this is the kind of comment I really need and I really treasure.