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Dani, James’s Wife

Posted by Bob on June 19th, 2006 under Comment Responses

When a man my age gets told a stunning young girl thinks he’s attractive, he gets all giggly and irrational. So when James quoted his bride as saying that about Ole Bob, you would expect me to be all flabbergasted and talk about nothing else.

I am above all that. I discussed James first and barely mentioned that Dani, his new wife, told him I was attractive.

I will now deign to address this subject. James says:


It was good to see you again at the conference this weekend! Too bad we didn’t have the time to get liquored up like we did in Charleston.

Dani has fallen in love with you. She has not stopped talking about you since Saturday night and wants to buy a dog and name it “B.W.,” in your honor. Do you have this effect on all women?

– James

Comment by James Edwards


Dani was at the Council of Conservative Citizens’ meeting in a dress that reminded me of what we used to call “evening dresses” in the 1950s. Women wore them on the most formal occassions. They were cut down in front.

Women were not ashamed to make it very, very clear that they were women with a triple w.

So Dani was faced with the fact that she wanted to make it clear that James had married a wow woman and to dress respectably.

In Dani’s case, the top was cut down as in the “evening dresses,” but the length of the dress was what we today consider average.

In other words, she looked classy but at the same time she was stating, “I am a WOMAN, and a beautifully formed woman.”

So here we have a combination of tradition and a statement.

Dani was dealing with a complicated statement. She hit the target perfectly.

But how do you tell her so?

How does a professional with words like myself deal with this complex phenomenon?

I smiled at her and said what I was thinking, “You are SO pretty.”

So why would Dani, of all people, NEED me to say that?

Sure, Dani is perfectly aware of her looks.

But when a man is sitting in the audience, he likes to be RECOGNIZED. No matter how sure you are of what you have done, it always helps if someone SAYS so.

Dani made a statement with her dress. She is all woman, LOTS of female beauty, and she SAID so. With women, what they wear is a statement.

If any man reading this were looking at Dani, he would be thinking exactly what I said:

“You are SO pretty.”

But with all the Women’s Lib crap, a modern male would wonder if he shouldn’t talk about her intellectual attainments first, or something more Relevant.

Let me repeat: Dani very carefully chose her dress to make a statement. She is a beautiful girl and that outfit made it very, very clear that she knows it and she doesn’t mind SAYING so.

Forgive me, gang, but when I see a girl like that, my first thought is NOT, “But I wonder what her attitude toward the Treaty of Vienna was?”

This is the woman James married. She is not worried about her own brain power.

Dani wants a man she respects to cut the crap and tell her that the statement she made with her gown was exactly what she wanted it to be. So a man her husband respects said exactly what she wanted to hear.

Every woman is thinking, “Why the hell doesn’t he just SAY so?”

I SAID so.

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  1. #1 by joe rorke on 06/19/2006 - 5:20 pm

    Younger women (and older women too) routinely tell me that I’m a handsome man. There is a reason for this. I am a handsome man. Ha! Ha! See how that works. Of course, I take it as a compliment. That’s what it is. I never forget, however, that the woman is always superior to me. She is smarter than me. I bow to the compliment and never let it go to my head. Women have always been smarter than me. Every last one of them. I’m just a stupid man. Especially when it comes to women. Thank God for women. A world full of nothing but jackass men would be hard to live in. Oh, sorry Bob, I forgot. You’re 99% atheist. Well, I thank God anyway.

    joe (the bourbon guy) rorke

  2. #2 by Shari on 06/19/2006 - 5:34 pm

    Dressing for women is getting to be a lost art from what you see these days. Sounds as if the young Mrs. Edwards has not lost it.

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