I just remembered the other thing I know about sex.
There was book by a disgusted woman back in the 1960s called “The Inept Seducer.” She explained at length how men goof it up. In the end, I was kind of proud to be male. It shows a certain perverse talent for us, living in a finite world, to find THAT MANY ways to turn a women off.
This was not a Women’s Lib book. She made it very clear that she longed for men to treat her like a woman. This led to the best part of the best part of the book. She was writing about the INept seducer. So at the end she wrote down ten points called, “How to be EPT.”
I tried them and my success rate rose dramatically. Granted I was starting from a pretty low base.
I don’t remember them all, and I can’t even quote them correctly. Let me repeat what I do remember. The lady gave us these pointers about what a man should do on a date, and they are inthe wrong order here:
1) “Make nice. Smile at us.”
In other words, do all the stuff A Real Man won’t do. As a British girl once told me very charmingly:
“I’m SUPPOSED to be a sissy. I’m a GIRL.”
After a lifetime of conditioning to impress everything about how Tough you are, a man tends to forget that little point on a date.
2) ” WORRY about us. ”
When the food comes inthe restaurant, don’t just dig in. Wait for her to try hers and asks how it is and if she wants you to call the waiter. That’s your job, not hers.
3) “Give us things.”
Always show up with a little something. Not something big enough to look like a seducation bribe. Something that shows you were thinking about her before the date.
4) “Touch us.”
Guide her into the car. Go open her door. Focus on HER. Put your hand on her back lightly. Use any excuse to put your hand under her arm to guide her along.
5) “Appreciate other women, but never ogle.”
A woman, she says, likes men who LIKE women. So if a good-looking woman comes by, you don’t try to make like a stuffed duck and look rigidly in front of you. You gie a quick up-and-down, an appraisal, and then turn back to your date.
All of us men are mystified by how little women OGLE men. Some do, but generally a woman can take a look at a man and they apparently have some special memory function that makes that all they need. We love to STARE, especially when ceretain parts of a woman’s body are especially prominent.
Assess, appreciate, don’t stare.
Women do not know how HARD this can be for us.
I don’t remember the rest. But the few I remembered even worked for ME.
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