B. U. G. S.

SysOp is the Lady of Quality I praised below. She is one of prizes among the best of the best that I suckered into … I mean, who really enjoyed my wide-open delegation style.

PLEASE don’t ask SysOp or Elizabeth or Shari or Papillon or any of our female members “What is a lady like you doing in a place like this?” They may start thinking about it, and we can’t afford to lose them.

Of course I like compliments, especially praise from the praiseworthy. But when a pro says that my advice is good, that is also information you can find useful. Here is SysOp on my method of operation:

“I appreciate what you’ve said here very much, Bob. If anyone comes away with anything you write about management, delegation, and those type of relations, please leave here understanding that Bob really knows what he’s talking about. Showing and making known one’s real gratefulness for acts or words that help you is at the top of the list. He knows the next best one is the profoundly real (and hardest to do right without all the but, but, buts) “Will you forgive me?” Because I mean what I say, I don’t need them to accept it, although sad, that is their rightful choice. I have no right to expect it of them.”

“We’ve picked over the up to 10 pages of CSS and straightened up some of the annoying format things, in several browsers, from the Theme that was hastily put together by another volunteer–even before I used much CSS. Let Mr. Kelso know if something major happens, or we missed someone’s pet peeve. Speak now, Mark, or forever hold your peace. And happy editing to the new Editor level volunteers you’re choosing.”

Comment by Sys Op

ME:

SysOp:

“He knows the next best one is the profoundly real (and hardest to do right without all the but, but, buts) “Will you forgive me?” Because I mean what I say, I don’t need them to accept it, although sad, that is their rightful choice. I have no right to expect it of them.”

There is SO much to that!

We live in a world of sociopaths and Tough Guys. The sociopaths find apology easy, because it means nothing to them. The Tough Guys brag, “I NEVER apologize.” So what do sane people do?

In this seminar we deal in sanity. For us an apology, for the person apologizing, is HARD, unlike the sociopath, but essential, as it is not to the Tough Guy. When a person worthy of respect offers you an apology, it should put you in a serius position.

In the South, where an apology was the only alternative to a duel between two men who were expert marksmen, an apology was everything. Our slogan was,

“A gentleman’s apology is ALWAYS accepted.”

As SysOp says, it was accepted without ANY comment. SysOp understands Southerners EXTREMELY well.

A note to the Tough Guys: The men who dealt with each other this way drove the Indians out of their land and kept blacks in line and all other whites followed them into battle in the Revolution and the Civil War. Frankly, I don’t the Tough Guys or the self-styled Greatest Generation would have been able to stand up to them for a minute.